ok, i’m trying the no shampoo thing because my hair is a huge hassle. It’s increadably course and thick with an unruly wave. I get it thinned a whole lot. When i just get my sides thinned out, it looks like a normal person shaved their head…I cut  my hair when i was 14 and gave it to locks of love. I lost 9lbs that day. 9 fucking pounds of hair. I’ve grown it to my shoulder blades & chopped it all off a few times since then

growing up, i had waist length hair that never saw a hairdresser. It tangled easily and i would cry every time i had to get it brushed. I have a pretty darn flaky scalp and i’ve never found a product that helps. 

 I am currently on a hair growing out phase and it is getting to the point where my dandruff is worse and my hair is starting to give me headaches because of the weight and tangle from the length. I want my hair to be beautiful and healthy again. i spent a long time killing it with chemicals and that’s a big part of why i have to cut t off & grow it out. 

this time around with my hair i am doing everything i can to make it as lovely  & healthy as i can. 
I’ve gone a week and a half since i used shampoo and it’s taking a little bit of getting used to, but i’ve already noticed an improvement. My flakes are much better, my hair isn’t as tangled and it’s not frizzy. Win all around! :D

I’ve just been scrubbing my scalp with a baking soda paste & rinsing with a mixture of vinegar & the last of my V05 peach conditioner (to help with the smell). When i’m out of the shower i use a lavender conditioner bar from The Dancing Dog Dairy (a couple of local farm girls who are earning money for their college fund by making beauty products with goat milk).

I’m about to wash my hair again & mix up some henna so not only will my hair feel extra nice, it will be very red again.

I’ll post before & after pictures later

literally the very first person died from my graduating class. i graduated in 07 and we didn’t loose anyone in all 4 years & we held on to everyone for another 5 1/2 years. that’s pretty impressive but damn, it’s a shame she died. It was even someone I knew…

gahhhhhh we have a disney & weed date tonight! gunna smoke, build a blanket fort & watch tangled.

he is so fucking cute!

he called me this morning (ha-morning? it was 11) because he tried to call his mom & she flipped her shit. :/ She’s got a small problem with me (duh, they all do) (and unrelated to the shit flipping) because when i stopped talking with zach, he was really heartbroken. that makes me very sad but i know i did what i had to for me & personal growth & whatnot…but damn do i like him. He’s…what i want out of a partner.

I do find him sexy. I have a type, it’s tall & skinny. I fucking LOVE that look on a guy. I may be in the minority, but that’s what i like. I love his hair too…he’s a very pretty man & that could give me pretty babies. Mmmm, babies with thick hair. Probably brown, but probably i could have a redhead…Anywho, he has such pretty light blue eyes too…And he bought me a stuffed animal! gah! a Dr Seuss stuffed animal. If i had to say what i hoped for, it would be horton. the lorax would be cool, so would the grinch…or max, the grinch’s dog… but i’ve never had a guy who gave me things. sure, davis drew some things for me…but i want toys damnit! To be fair, david bradshaw did give me toys, just years after he promised to…

But if zach really wants his mom’s house, and he’s the kind of man I think he is, i could live a life i feel like i deserve. a bigger life than my mom had, a bigger life than i had but probably as big as my dad’s. and i do think it’s important to have neighbor friends as a kid. I think it’s important to provide a better & better life for kids. 

gah he gives me feels. 

i need to drive. just be a brave little toaster & drive. I will request a new learner’s permit, i think it’s just 10 bucks & i will *shudder* drive places

i never talk about weddings because i just have always felt like i was too young or not in a relationship where i should start to fantasize about that sort of thing. Now i suppose i feel like i am getting to an age where i could start to think about preferences because it is a sort of societal norm and damn i do like to think about dresses & big parties. 

There are a few things i’ve figured out. Because of the relationship i have with both my biological & adopted father I want my mother to walk me down the isle. I want to get her dress from the victorian trading company. I want there to be a significant Princess Bride influence. I will have my long thick hair like when i was 14 (there’s pictures of me on the internet, i’m sure you could find me. I’m an open person. I can’t live any other way…but that’s another story) Durring the cerimony, it will be down & loose. A very long veil & a dress with a drop waist & long train. I want the train to bustle up with clasps on the inside. {there will be a picture of sha pinning me up. i have lots of ideas for pictures…} i know i will be a neurotic bride, but shalynn can smooth me out. oh my & zoey will be ticked out in the cutest thing i can find…with lace-up boots if i can. 
When i think about zach, he’s in a kilt. i mean UNF. but i’m always hopeful for a man in a skirt and i enjoy it being culturally aprropriate based on genioligy…
If i had an outdoor wedding, i would want it in Fox Park. [for those of you who do not know anything about Ceci-ese: as a child, I renamed all the parks I liked to go to as a child after things I liked or some identifying factor. There’s a park in Downtown Houston that has a lot of cool features, there’s a bunch of old historical houses, decorated fitting the time, there’s a cool statue of an angel with a big fuck-off-sword. It’s called The Spirit of the Confederacy. I don’t want you to think i’m one of those confederate flag waving people, i am just a fan of this piece of art. there are also bronze fox statues that my dog Dazie would growl at, where my name came from] but i don’t really want an outdoor wedding. there are too many variables & i would flip my shit. but engagement pictures would be cool there…I kind of want a church wedding. but either FUUCNO or some tiny one room thing with a red door. 
at the reception i want a huge fuck off party. it will be awesome. I will dance all fucking night & drink sparkling water

there will be a good dj who understands how to set moods, but a designated playlist.

last night i had a dream where zach & i were packing for disneyworld & i wanted his help packing because i wanted everyday to be a really cute looking day because the other dy in the real world, zachy said he would propose somewhere magical like disneyworld…anywho, he wouldn’t help me pack & i was upset about that…yay for being transparent with your dream symbolisation there ceci…

I am thinking about zachary a lot lately…just a lot. he makes me happy & excited. we’re going to build planket forts, get high, eat yummy noms & watch movies tomorrow night. :3 he makes me so friken happy. gahhh

i want a better relationship with blake. and i want to talk with zachy about his ability to be a dad. 
Sha really supports writing things down, so i will try. i’m on the computer often so i will do some here & i will do some on paper because I belive in the written word. (also, i would like to see zachy’s handwritting…)

But anywho, i will write, and not care about my spelling or the disordered way my thoughts fall out of my head…

i am having such a  good time with zach, it’s amazing. i think i will amost feel better after we’ve had a larger disagreement or some sort of tribulation, but maybe those are the wrong things to be expecting out of a relationship…I mean, shalynn is your absolute best friend & we have never had a fight (omg, what is my problem with pov). Maybe zachary is great because he’s actually able to be my best friend. I really want him to meet shalynn & marcos soon. I think before mom & blake…But zach said he was thinking of me as a best friend. and I really like his friends. 

ok, enough rambling for now

afternoonsnoozebutton:

lilguy520 replied your post

Someones being a vapid cunt.

hey bro instead of posting insulting replies on everything i post, why don’t you just